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SANELY FUNNY COVER STORY

GEORGE W. AS GEORGE WASHINGTON,
CROSSING THE TIGRIS

Does George W. have the stuff George Washington had when he crossed the Delaware and defeated the Hessians and then the Red Coats? Can he sense that now is the moment to get his butt over there himself, instead of relying on forward scouts like Condi Rice, and sit down with the divisive Iraqi parliament to hammer out a new government? FULL STORY

DREADLINE OF THE WEEK

ITALIAN CATHOLIC CONVERTS
TO ISLAM.
POPE SCHEDULES LUNCH.

We are delighted to report that we now have cause for a respite from what we might call the Middle Eastern Middle Ages. Our rather unlikely benefactor is none other than the usually acutely conservative Pope Benedict. 

Not wishing to burden the curious convert with a trip to Rome, the Pope asked to be driven to Parma, where the questing soul lives. 

Their conversation, as recorded by a Vatican stenographer, who, out of deference to their guest, ordered proscuitto and melon, was a commendable model of tolerance that, in our religiously divisive time, begs to be presented in full.
FULL STORY

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SHREDITORIAL

TRAFFIC TICKETS BREAK
SPEED LIMIT

They're being issued at breakneck speed. Why? You pay a guy a thousand bucks or so a week – and he writes a thousand bucks worth of traffic tickets even on a slow morning.
FULL STORY

HEY, USA

COLLEGE BOARD FLUNKS SAT. MAY DISCOVER POINT AND CLICK

After another incriminating episode of pencil scratches gone wrong, is it time for The College Board, which oversees the tests, to discover point and click.
FULL STORY

FOREIGN FRIENDS
AND WOES


IRAN SEEKS ATOMIC BOMB
FOR PEACEFUL PURPOSES

The announcement removed all doubt about Tehran’s true intentions and sparked an immediate debate guaged to provide time for the nettlesome nation to develop one.
FULL STORY

WASHINGTON SPIN DIN

WASHINGTON MONUMENT DEVELOPS DROOP

The surprising tilt was first noticed by an amateur architect, who never takes a vacation without a pocket level.
FULL STORY

HILARIOUS SPOOF
OF THE WEEK


HOMELAND INSECURITY

If the government's ability to smuggle radioactive material into the U. S concerns you, read about its reassuring plan to put a missle in every chimney. FULL STORY

 

DOLLARS AND NONSENSE

SHOULD NATURE CHARGE
FOR SUNLIGHT?

Executives argue that free sunlight is fiscally irresponsible and seek dialogue with Mother Nature.
FULL STORY

WHAT THE TECH

NEW VIDEO GAME FEATURES CHARITABLE COMBAT

FULL STORY

HEALTH AND PRICES

ONE SENIOR FIGURES OUT
NEW MEDICARE DRUG PLAN.
OTHERS MAKING OWN DRUGS. PLUS, WHAT BIRD-FLU SCARE?
FULL STORY

LAW AND DISORDER

IN EMINENT DOMAIN DECISION, SUPREME COURT SPLITS ALONG HUMANITARIAN LINES.
FULL STORY

CULTURE

WHISTLER'S MOTHER KICKED OUT

In new edition of standard textbook, she goes MIA, or missing in art. FULL STORY

WHAT'S ENTERTAINMENT

IS RAP MUSIC
A CONTRADICTION IN TERMS?

FULL STORY

SPORTS SHORTS

HEAVYWEIGHT BOXING:
THE SPORT WITHOUT STARS

FULL STORY

CLEVER MONKEY
OF THE WEEK


HAMID KARZAI

For somehow getting the case thrown out against the Muslim man who converted to Christianity.
FULL STORY

WEATHER & POLLUTION

WHY THE MIDWEST IS FLAT

Seismological tests reveal there are just too many fat people walking on it.
FULL STORY

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

“I believe … we have the ability to solve our problems, otherwise human life would be illogical, and nature is, if anything, precise to distant decimals.” Charles Blaise, Life Itself As A Modern Religion*

*(c) toreasonpublishing.com
Used with permission.

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