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SANELY FUNNY COVER STORY

New Government Study Fails To Locate Mexicans Who Know What A Ladder Is

Mexicans going over the wall on one another's shoulders with Mexican in the foreground saying, "No, segnor, we have no ladder."

An extensive study by the U. S. government of Mexicans hoping to enter America illegally has concluded that not a single one of them knows what a ladder is. This key finding has given impetus to funding for extensions of the border fence between America and Mexico.

As President Bush noted, “Today is a lucky day for America. We have learned that aspiring illegal immigrants cannot resort to ladders, because they never heard of them. So all we need is a fence that’s too high to jump over.”
FULL STORY

DREADLINE OF THE WEEK

New Bush Tactic On
“Stay The Course” In Iraq: “Don’t Say It; Just Stay It.”

The press was abuzz with the news that President Bush has dropped the dumb saying in regard to Iraq that America will “stay the course.” Unfortunately, almost all other comments emanating from the oval office indicate that he intends to keep the same dumb strategy.

In other words, with political pressures mounting as the November wakeup call draws nigh, the administration seems to have arrived at the politically expedient policy, “Don’t say it; just stay it.”

Oh, there has been a certain amount of obliging talk by the administration about drawing up benchmarks for such woefully overdue items as the reduction of violence and the turnover of peacekeeping duties to the Iraqis. But Donald Rumsfeld, being the exact speaker that he unavoidably is, preferred the term “park benches” and noted that under such languorous conditions specific dates are impractical. FULL STORY

SHREDITORIAL

Everyday Events Now Make Halloween Night Seem Safe


HEY, USA

Politicians Now Have Clean Hands; Rectitude Not Required



FOREIGN FUN

Communists Sell North Korea And Iran "The Noose To
Hang Themselves With"

WASHINGTON SPIN DIN

SPOOF OF THE WEEK

The Invention Of
Land Creatures

Part Six Of
The Invention Of Everything;
An Eyewitness Account

CULTURE & COMEDY

Lisey’s Story By Stephen King:
A Romance Just In Time
For Halloween


TECH HUMOR

New Cosmetic Surgery Provides Eyelashes You Can Perm



CLEVER MONKEY

Vladimir Putin
For saying he won’t run for a fourth term



WITTY QUOTE

“A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell.”
G. B. Shaw, Parents and Children


About Tom Attea, Humorist

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