HEY, USA

U. S. Farmers Grown Most Corn Since 1944;
Goal Is To Feed Hungry Cars

According to a report from the U. S. Department of Agriculture, this year American farmers will plant more corn than they have since World War II.

No wonder. Due to our new appetite for ethanol, they’ve got millions of hungry cars to feed.

So down with acres of soy beans and fields of cotton! Today when American farmers look at those golden kernels, they don’t just see corn on the cob. Their imaginations are filled with gold bullion, as they contemplate millions of cars with full tanks of E-85, purring away contentedly.

But corn lovers take notice. It seems so many cars are hungry for ethanol that, despite the abundant crop of maze, there may be a shortage of corn for people to eat.

And we all know that means you’ll need to spend more gold to put those golden kernels in your tummy tank.

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